Month: February 2004

CNN, circa 1863

A few minutes ago, CNN ran a segment about today’s Democratic Primaries. The anchor posed the question of whether or not Southerners would be able to accept “the Democratic front-runner, Northerner John Kerry“.

I resent the implication that I would not vote for him because he’s a Northerner and I’m a Southerner.

Surveys of voters in Tennessee and Virginia have shown Kerry leading those races, despite being a Massachusetts Yankee running against two men with Southern roots.

I care about issues and ideas, not birthplace. Contrary to popular perception, I don’t still reminisce about the “War of Northern Aggression”.

I voted for democracy

I voted for General Wes Clark in today’s Virginia Democratic Primary. I admit that I have not voted in every election since I turned 18, but I always vote in Presidential and Congressional elections. Voting is good, mmmmmmmkay.

In elections, I’ve always voted for Democrats. In my first elections, it was because I considered myself a democrat. However, I’ve always had an independent view. Socially, I believe in hands off involvement. The government’s job in social issues is to protect civil rights, not to suppress them. Economically, capitalism has worked for more than two centuries, in spite of politicians. I want a responsible tax policy (flat tax) and a balanced budget. I have simple political ideals and goals.

The 2000 Presidential election was the first time I stretched my mind around my ritual “Vote Democrat” mindset. Despite Joe Lieberman’s censorship rhetoric, I voted for Gore in the election because he was the least objectionable to me. That year, I also voted in the Republican primary.

The only “requirement” for voting in that primary was that I acknowledge, on my honor, that I would not vote in another party’s primary. Since the Democrats weren’t holding a primary because Gore was the incumbent nominee, I had no problem signing that. (Yes, I had to sign a piece of paper. I didn’t have to sign anything today.)

In that primary, I voted for John McCain as a vote against George W. Bush. Walking into the polling station, I felt weird voting Republican. Walking out, I felt liberated from the rigid party mentality. Because of social issues, I’ll still be surprised if I ever vote Republican, but if the Republicans nominate a social “live and let live” candidate, I’d consider it.

At times, I’ve thought my reliance on social issues might be too narrow, but I’m comfortable with it. No individual social issue will rule my vote, but a collection of them will. I believe that the free market will ultimately determine the economy and bad economic politicians will be voted out. That doesn’t happen with social issues. Bad policy becomes law and then takes years to repeal or overturn. Civil liberties and freedom are the basis for America. Without them, we’re no different than a common dictatorship.

Today, we’re moving in the wrong direction. Censorship is encouraged to preserve family values. Our president wants to amend the U.S. Constitution to define marriage as one man and one woman. A few years ago, the Congress proposed a Constitutional amendment to ban flag burning. Rights are under attack and the right to vote is every citizen’s first defense.

The Constitution has been amended once to take away citizen’s rights. Prohibition was a disaster which was later repealed. Any new amendment reducing liberty is a crime against the spirit of the Constitution, yet this great nation has considered it twice in the last 5 years. It’s time for responsibility.

My purpose is not to make anyone agree with me. Obviously I believe I’m correct, but the point is that because someone doesn’t agree with my views, that doesn’t permit them to take my rights away. Your reward for living in America is that you get to live your life as you wish. Your penalty is that I get to live as I wish.

I don’t think it’ll make good business sense to start showing breasts on prime time television, but the law shouldn’t remove the right if public sentiment changes. I don’t want to marry a man, but someone else wants to show that commitment to the man he loves. I don’t want to burn the flag, but someone else believes that is how she should express herself. If any of those actions happen, who has been harmed? No one will suffer physical injury, so our government’s role is satisfied. As for non-physical injury and mental anguish, that is up to the individual. If you disagree, turn off the TV, don’t associate with homosexuals, fly 3 flags in your front yard. You have that right. Do you mind if I take it away?

Vote in 2004.

From the Communist Marketing Department

Until a few days ago, The Washington Post tracked its online readers through browser cookies, storing gender, birth year, and zip code. They finally got wise that this was insufficient at best. My tracking info told them that I am a 39 year-old female living in Maryland, so it may have been incorrect, as well.

After several years of this, they learned, so the site now requires registration. When I first logged on, I was annoyed. The marketing people may have figured out that I was lying to them, but they haven’t gotten smarter. The new “slogan” is ridiculous. “REGISTER NOW. IT’S FREE AND IT’S REQUIRED.” Wow, that gives me the warm-fuzzies.

Unfortunately, I still need my fix of Redskins news. I started to register.

When I got to Year of Birth, I entered the real value, then saw the note that says “under 13? Go here.”This is the web page that pops up:

It’s obvious that they’re following the law. However, why should kids under 13 be excluded from reading the “regular” news? Is it just for adults? Will there be boobs? What, pray tell, is the explanation?

Since I’ve read the garbage that is the print edition of the KidsPost, I assumed the explanation is that The Washington Post believes kids are stupid. To find out, I clicked the link in the popup window. You can click the picture to see where the link ends up.

Let me make sure I understand this. The kids are the stupid ones who shouldn’t be reading the news? How are they supposed to read the sanitized, dumbed-down news intended for them if the adults programming the site can’t get the links coordinated?

I have an attention span

When I get ready for work in the morning, I watch music videos on MTV Hits, VH1 Classic, VH1 Mega Hits, and VH1 Country. I know it’s a bizarre concept, but I actually like videos more than Carmen Electra describing the shoes she wore to the Grammy’s. I’m old school like that.

Danielle woke me up to Joss Stone a few weeks ago, and I can’t stop listening to The Soul Sessions. Today, the video for “Fell In Love With A Boy” came on VH1 Mega Hits. I’ve seen bits of the video, but never from the beginning so I stopped putting my socks on and watched the video.

Correctly, the brilliant minds at VH1 Mega Hits decided that I’d like the video better if I could watch a giant white box cover the top right quarter of the screen. The regular networks haven’t gone far enough in their screen usage. I, the viewer, do not want a transparent network symbol in the corner of the screen. There is too much crap on television, so I’d rather watch something on top of the program. Instead of giving me the logo, VH1 Mega Hits offered me an “Inside Track” into Joss Stone that filled the quarter-screen white box.

In this beautiful box, I got a great bit of useful information. Specifically, I learned that Joss Stone has a big voice. VH1 has taught me that my eyes are a better judge of her voice than my ears. The mystery is revealed.

As a final ummph, VH1 offered this statement about Joss Stone in the wonderful white box: “Dusty Springfield, watch your back.”

That’s stupid. If I have to tell you why, please do a Google search for Dusty Springfield.

JC Chasez’s inner diva

JC Chasez was so upset about being removed from the Pro Bowl halftime show that he told the NFL to kiss his ass. Yesterday, I made this suggestion to him.

A quick tangent… JC, my friend. It’s clear you’ve been listening to me since you told the NFL to kiss your ass. Why won’t you answer my other question? You know the one I’m talking about. I promise, if you answer, I’ll stop asking. Thanks.

Returning from the tangent… No one should quietly walk away from getting beaten down for something other people did. Thanks to more moral grandstanding from the NFL, he finally reached his boiling point.

“I have had a great relationship with the NFL in the past and feel that I have been mistreated,” Chasez said in a statement, adding that he’s won’t sing The Star-Spangled Banner before Sunday’s annual all-star game in Honolulu.

…

“While I agree the mishap at the Super Bowl was a huge mistake, the NFL’s shallow effort to portray my music as sexually indecent brings to mind another era when innocent artists were smeared with a broad brush by insecure but powerful people,” Chasez said in his statement. “That’s not the America I love. Nor is this the NFL I love. I’ll sing the national anthem anytime, anywhere, but not for this NFL.”

You go on with your bad self, JC. And thanks for these quotes from your inner diva:

“I decided to be obliging. I wanted to go with the flow and I wanted to be a team player, I wanted to come to the NFL’s rescue,” Chasez told the AP. “If that’s what it will take to put out a fire, then fine, I’ll do the Drumline song.”

…

Chasez also complained that he passed on a chance to be at Sunday’s Grammy Awards because of his planned Pro Bowl appearance. “Now I have to jockey for my position back in there,” he told the AP.

The NFL responded with a non-response:

McCarthy’s [NFL Spokesman] response: “We’re not going to debate him. We made our decision and we’re going to move on.”

Why not? Unlike the Pro Bowl, I would watch a debate between JC Chasez and the NFL.

Finally, I have to respond to this statement from the NFL:

McCarthy said it was unclear who would sing the national anthem before Sunday’s Pro Bowl, which is airing on ESPN.

The answer is obvious: William Hung.

No one was planning to watch

The NFL has lost its mind. They axed JC Chasez from performing at the Pro Bowl halftime show because he might, maybe, could, sorta, possibly do something they don’t like. This is a great pre-emptive strike to protect the hearts and minds of the nation’s fragile citizens.

I understand that JC Chasez’s current single is Some Girls (Dance With Women). I didn’t know that before reading the article, but stick with me, I’m making a point. I’ve even seen him perform in person, so I know what kind of entertainment he can offer. See for yourself.

All of that should raise sufficient suspicion about his planned Pro Bowl halftime show. However, I suspect he’s smart enough to know that a repeat of the Super Bowl halftime show would be unwise. That makes this next statement nothing but action for the sake of action.

“The commissioner said Monday morning that we will change our policies and procedures as it relates to entertainment during our games,” league spokesman Brian McCarthy said. “This is immediate action that reflects that approach.”

Chasez responded through his record company with this statement:

“No one could be more disappointed than I that the NFL has canceled my halftime performance at the Pro Bowl this coming Sunday,” Chasez said. “I’ve told the NFL I understand the pressure that they are under since the Super Bowl.”

He should’ve told them to kiss his ass.

Even though he was cordial, he’s still going to have the last laugh. Anyone (me) who thinks the Super Bowl halftime show is a crapfest, wait until we see the sanitized Pro Bowl halftime show. My heart is fluttering at the thought of “200 hula dancers, 1,000 other dancers, drummers and a new song called Welcome to my Paradise“. That is the result of moral, indignant grandstanding.

If the NFL allows JC Chasez to attend the Super Bowl, at least he’ll be on hand to dry Paul Tagliabue’s tears when the Pro Bowl ratings come out. Maybe JC will offer his Burberry scarf for the task.

Congressman Loose Cannon responds

I received this response to yesterday’s e-mail. To his credit, he gave some thought to what I said and addressed the issues rather than offering “political speak” as to why he’s right and I should be thankful that he’s fighting to protect me from the world’s evil-doers. Here’s the e-mail:

I apologize for the mistake in responding to your previous e-mail.

I agree with your assessment that attempting to ban specific words could run into significant First Amendment issues. As you know, it has always been difficult to define obscenity and indecency, a fact illustrated by the FCC Enforcement Board’s October decision on Bono’s use of the F-word. Another historical example is U.S. Supreme Court Justice Potter Stewart’s famous claim that while he could not describe obscenity, he would know it when he saw it.

I think the move to significantly increase fines for the broadcast of indecent material, as well as the public backlash against the Superbowl halftime show, and to a lesser extent Bono’s acceptance speech, will make networks reconsider whether pushing the envelope on decency standards is really in their best interests. That is why I chose to highlight some of the legislative developments with regard to these efforts in my previous email.

Regarding your specific oposition to H.R. 3687, I am not a cosponsor and do not foresee it coming before the House. I do, however, think there will be further reviews of the FCC’s oversight of decency standards in the appropriate committees of jurisdiction.

Again, I apologize for not closely reading your E-mail. Your anger is justifiable, however, I hope my past and future representation of you would give you pause to reconsider your opposition to my future service.

Sincerely,

Tom Davis
Member of Congress

As ridiculous as this situation got, it’s a reminder that this is a great country. I can deal directly with my elected government officials and not fear retribution. I highly recommend such an experience to everyone.

Congressman Loose Cannon

A few weeks ago, I posted my views on H.R. 3687. In that post, I mentioned that I e-mailed my Congressman and the Chairman and Commissioners of the FCC. I expected a letter in the mail, but received an e-mail response instead. Here is what the e-mail said:

Thank you for writing to let me know of your support for H.R. 3687. I appreciate hearing from you on this issue.

As you know, there have been several instances of foul language being used during award shows over the past year. In October, the Federal Communications Commission (FCC) Enforcement Board ruled that the use of the F-word, as used by the performer Bono during the Golden Globe awards, did not meet the definition of indecent behavior and therefore did not merit punishment. Many expressed concern that this ruling was in error and that to allow such language on broadcast television, regardless of the context, should be considered indecent. Concerns were also raised that the ruling would create a sprint to the bottom as celebrities and networks tried to one-up each other with increasingly outrageous behavior and language. Unfortunately, the halftime show at the Superbowl proved this was a valid concern.

In response to these events, FCC Chairman Powell announced that he would have the five FCC commissioners review the ruling of the Enforcement Board’s ruling on the Bono incident and that he supported overturning the decision. In addition, Chairman Powell also announced he would seek to raise the maximum fine for decency violations by a factor of ten, from the current $27,500 per incident to $275,000 per incident.

The House Energy and Commerce Committee, which has jurisdiction over broadcast matters, recently held a hearing to examine the FCC’s enforcement policies on decency matters. At this hearing, Representative Fred Upton (R-MI) announced he would be introducing a bill to do as Powell suggested, that is, increasing fines by a factor of ten. I expect this legislation will come before the House in the near future. When it does, I plan to support it.

Again, thank you for taking the time to share your concerns. I hope you will continue to share your views with me in the future.

Sincerely,
Tom Davis
Member of Congress

I responded immediately. Here’s what I wrote:

Congressman Davis,

If you’d actually read my e-mail to Congressman Davis, you would know that I do NOT support H.R. 3687. Allow me to paste the content of my previous e-mail here. It was as follows:

>>>>

After reading that the FCC would rule that no use of the “f-word” is acceptable on the airwaves, I discovered that HR 3687 is under consideration. As a constituent of yours, I do not support this bill because it ignores the First Amendment of the U.S. Constitution.

While I am not offended by such language, I understand that others may be offended. However, the purpose of the constitution is to provide majority rule while protecting the rights of the minority. Free speech is a right, not a priviledge. Do not support this bill.

>>>>

I think the content of the bill is an outrage and illegal under the Constitution. If you support this bill, at least know that you are NOT representing my beliefs or the ideals of the United States.

As for the Super Bowl, the “controversy” was blown out of proportion. I do not feel the halftime display was appropriate, but I also believe that there is too much self-righteous indignation surrounding the event. Please learn to trust Americans to think for themselves.

Based on this issue, I am mortified that you represent my district. Because I support the Constitution, we don’t share the same views. At a minimum, I expect my Congressman to be able to determine that my last e-mail was not a support for H.R. 3687. Please know that I will be working to support any candidate that runs against you in the next election.

Thank you,
Tony

My tax dollars at work. If you’re not registered to vote, this is the reason you need to register immediately and vote every November. Stunning.

Please to Settle Down, America

I need to rant one more time about the Super Bowl halftime show. This post will be disjointed because I’m going to quote this article and comment on each quote. So it begins…

Executives at PepsiCo, historically one of the largest and most successful Super Bowl advertisers, are threatening to pull out of next year’s Super Bowl if they’re not given clear assurances that such an incident won’t happen again. “We’re very serious about this,” PepsiCo spokesman Mark Dollins said.

PepsiCo executives also were disappointed that viewers were talking more about the Jackson incident than the commercials. “It speaks to our extreme disappointment that all that quality work has been overshadowed,” Dollins said. The various PepsiCo brands, including Frito-Lay, Sierra Mist and Pepsi, aired six commercials on Sunday’s broadcast.

I know why people are talking about this more than the commercials: the commercials sucked. And what Janet Jackson revealed was no worse than some of the commercials Pepsi has aired. And Pepsi has no right to be indignant. Until they stop selling sugar water that rots bodies, they aren’t allowed to be indignant about a semi-bare breast rotting minds.

The incident shocked a society that seems to be ever more unshockable, but this time it might have gone too far for many Americans. On one side of the debate: outraged citizens who immediately lit up the CBS switchboard with complaints.

Their sentiments were no doubt much like those of M.B. Ellis, 78, owner of a small publishing house in Mobile, Ala., who wrote in a letter to USA TODAY’s Sports section: “What a depressing display of filth, obscenity, cruelty, and just plain stupidity! What ever happened to dignity and good taste in this country?”

“What’s in line for next year’s halftime show?” asked Ed Zak, 43, a father of three from New Smyrna Beach, Fla. “How about two ‘artists’ having sex at the 50-yard line – all in the name of NFL entertainment. When you do, please give us a head’s up so I can prepare myself how to explain to my kids what they watched.”

I’m not unshockable, but I’m not shocked by this. This is stupid. And if you’re so upset, why write to USA Today? What can they do about it?

The Super Bowl’s halftime show itself has become something to watch as it has become edgier. It has gone from marching bands and Up With People to attention-getting pop stars in elaborately produced spectacles. And it’s gobbled up by the viewers.

Because lemmings love a good crapfest.

Sex literally sells: A piece of jewelry similar to the one Jackson was wearing on her breast was available on eBay before the day was out. A sun shield design for pierced nipples had an opening bid of $19.99 and was touted “as seen on TV!”

Did it literally sell? Are people buying them or are they just for sale? There is a difference.

For its part, AOL, which spent an estimated $10 million to sponsor the halftime show and broadcast several ads and promos during and before the game, said it’s not very happy with the outcome. The company dropped plans to offer Internet access to rebroadcasts of the show “in deference to our membership and the fans,” said Ruth Sarfaty, an AOL spokeswoman.

“In deference” to their membership and the fans? Dear AOL: I already have a mommy, thanks. Since you think I need a new one, I don’t ask her approval when I want to watch something on TV or the internet. I’m never going to ask for your approval.

Parents Television Council president Brent Bozell rejected the denials. “The performance, including the offensive material, was obviously scripted,” he said in a statement issued by his parents advocacy group. “We find Justin Timberlake’s apology and explanation to be dishonest and disingenuous.”

I’ll group this with the next quote.

The Family Research Council and the Southern Baptist Convention also denounced the show. Council president Tony Perkins urged the FCC on Monday to hold CBS accountable. “CBS should know better than to turn the halftime entertainment over to MTV, which relishes its ability to shock. CBS would do well to adhere to the adage ‘If you sleep with dogs, you’ll get fleas.’ I am sure there is a lot of scratching going on at CBS today.”

Thanks for judging people. Justin Timberlake is a liar and “CBS should know better”. Family values protecting our nation. Kick ass.

Some ad experts didn’t buy official explanations, either. Jerry Della Femina, ad guru and CEO of Della Femina, Rothschild, Jeary & Partners, a Manhattan-based ad agency, said Monday that even if the networks weren’t aware that Jackson was going to bare her breast, CBS should have known what to expect.

“When CBS put these people on the halftime show, they had to know what they would get. They are screaming, ‘This is terrible.’ It’s like Claude Rains discovering there’s gambling at Rick’s in Casablanca: ‘I’m shocked, shocked.’ For CBS it’s a little too late.”

This is a brilliant PR stunt. Get your ad agency talked about while moralizing. Maybe they can produce ads for The Family Research Council.

But not everyone was unhappy. TiVo Inc., which makes digital video recorders enabling instantaneous replay, said viewership of the revealing moment nearly doubled that of the rest of the broadcast, the biggest jump the company has ever measured.

And how does TiVo know this? Because they monitor their customers. Think about that for a moment and tell me that the halftime show is our nation’s biggest concern.

“We have no say over halftime entertainment,” said Jeff Kuhlman, spokesman for the Cadillac division of General Motors, which aired three spots during the game and was the official vehicle of the Super Bowl. “We think the NFL will do what’s right for their brand. Quite frankly, we’re very comfortable having our brand aligned with their brand.”

I don’t own a Cadillac, but I applaud them for being reasonable about this.

FYI, I also know why Cadillac is being reasonable about this. They’ve thought about their commercials from the Super Bowl. They realize that the “our car is faster than the speed of sound commercial was illogical. If the car was faster than the speed of sound, it would’ve taken a moment for the sound to catch up. That concept is cool. But the driver’s voice wouldn’t have been delayed because the car was sitting still when he said “wow”. His voice should’ve been heard, followed by the car’s road noise catching up to the car.

This entire scandal is tiresome. I imagine that the rest of the world is laughing at us. To that, I say this: Grow up, America.