Two miles of fun

My morning commute to the Metro is short. Out of the sub-division, turn right, turn right, turn right, turn left, turn left and I’m there. It takes approximately 7 minutes. 420 seconds. I thought that not much could happen in such a short time, but I learn something new every day.

To the driver of the SUV… I know your SUV proves that you don’t care about the price of a gallon of gasoline, but you don’t have to prove that you don’t care about time. Green lights mean “Go”. When I’m waiting behind your SUV in the future, please don’t sit at the light until it turns yellow and then decide to drive off. I don’t have your carefree attitude.

To the driver of the sports car… I know the light was only a green circle and not a green arrow, but “Yield” means to give way when there are cars zooming by in the other direction. No cars whizzing by is an indication that you can turn. Since I’m behind you in the same lane, I’m trying to turn as well. Please don’t impede my way because you’re afraid of cicadas buzzing by your window.

To the driver of the minivan… There is a speed limit in the parking garage and you’re nowhere near it. Please consider pushing harder on the gas pedal, it’ll help us all. As for your turn signal, have you ever seen a NASCAR driver use a turn signal during a race? I didn’t think so. Do you know why? Because they’re driving in a circle, just like we were this morning. The line of cars and the wall blocking left turns are solid indications that you’ll be turning right. I don’t need extra hints, but since you have a New York Mets license plate frame, I understand that you might.

Thank you.